Childhood Depression, Feeling Blue or Seeking Attention?

If our memory serves right and we think hard enough, we might be able to remember instances from our childhood when we felt sad and down, without any apparent reason. At times, the elders around us would say, ‘Oh that’s nothing’.

Or that’s what the elders usually thought. Wasn’t it?

What is really interesting to note is, don’t we often end up doing the same with our kids

Some statements that parents often make when they refer to their children’s feelings are “Oh that’s nothing”, “That’s just their way of gaining attention”, “They are just being over dramatic” and so on, along with statements like “What do they have to be depressed about? When we were that age, we were just happy”.

And these statements give rise to the questions -

When we were kids, were our emotions really nothing but a ‘way of gaining attention’ or us ‘just being over dramatic’? Were we really always ‘just happy’?

These things definitely have nothing to do with Depression. Or do they?

What exactly is this thing that goes around by the name of Depression?

Author William Styron had memorably called Depression ‘The grey drizzle of horror’.

As stated by the World Health Organization (WHO), Depressive Disorder or Depression is a common and serious mental illness which involves low mood or loss of pleasure or interest in activities for long periods of time.

American Psychological Association (APA) explains Depression as a negative affective state, ranging from unhappiness and discontent to an extreme feeling of sadness, pessimism, and despondency, that interferes with daily life.

Characterised by a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest, Depression is more than simply feeling unhappy or fed up for a few days or something you can just "snap out of" by "pulling yourself together". It negatively affects how we feel, the way we think and how we behave.

An individual is diagnosed with Clinical Depression or Major Depressive Disorder when a number of symptoms, that include low mood, feeling sad and empty and loss of interest in previously enjoyed things and activities, last every day, nearly all day, for at least two weeks.

But…

Can children go through something like this? Is Childhood Depression even a thing?

As stated earlier, Depression is more than just ‘being sad’ or ‘feeling blue’.

Children often have mood swings. They may feel sad or irritable.

It is when these feelings of sadness, irritability, or hopelessness persistently last for more than 2 weeks that we may diagnose it as Depression.

Cause of Depression lies in not one factor but a combination of multiple factors such as -

● physical health - illness or injury;

● stressful life events - separation or divorce of parents, moving, school change, death in the family;

● genetic vulnerability and family history of Depression or Anxiety Disorders;

● home environment - family conflicts, violence, abuse;

● school environment - bullying or abuse by peers or teachers, conflicts with friends;

● exposure to incidences of trauma

● biochemical disturbance

How to understand when a child is going through Depression?

For a fact, children may not be sure how to express their feelings. Or they may be unwilling to express, with an underlying fear of being judged or misunderstood.

Signs and symptoms of Depression in a Child may include:

➢ sadness or low mood or more irritable than usual

➢ lack of interest in fun activities

➢ low energy levels or general tiredness

➢ negative self-talk or low self-esteem

➢ eating more or less than usual

➢ trouble sleeping or sleeping too much

➢ feelings of guilt and/or crying

➢ difficulty concentrating

➢ emotional or vocal outbursts

➢ frequent expression of physical illness, such as headaches or stomach aches

➢ reduced concentration

➢ decline in performance at school

➢ being more sensitive to rejection

➢ trouble during events and activities at home or with friends, in school, during extracurricular activities, and with other hobbies or interests

➢ repeated mentions of not being loved by parents or family members

➢ running away from home or talking about running away from home

➢ talking about death or dying

So, the next time you notice something like this happening with your child or see that your child is behaving unusually, don’t just brush it aside thinking “That’s nothing”, “That’s just their way of gaining attention” or “They are just being over dramatic”.

Spend some time with your child and try to understand what is going on.

They may be feeling lonely. Or they may be feeling way more than they can express.

A lot could be going on in their mind. Or a lot could be going on with them.

Be compassionate. Be patient.

And not to forget, don’t go for experiments. Seek professional help. A collaborative effort of a professional and you, can work wonders for your child.

Let's stay healthy, not only physically but emotionally and mentally as well!

~Mrinmoyee Saha

Counselling Psychologist